The Chronicles of Gerald
by conley
Summary: The insane writings of two completely bored, totally obsessed RA fans in maths...Gerald is a garden gnome, Halt thinks he is "OMG! SOOOO CUTE!" and Will..well..he isnt impressed..R&R..NO FLAMES PLzZ!
1. Chapter 1

**soo..we are conley...AKA cece-noon and DotCom-WDB.  
****conley is our names merged as one...**

**at the moment its just me, .com...my cowriter is..well...at home...nd Im at mine..we dont live at the same home..but I am going to her house this weekend..AAALLLL WEEKEND!!..that wazZ a bit off topic but before I get bk on topic I just wanna say this: _I AM SO EVIL, I AM ANTI-NICE!!_**

**this story cam to us in maths...we dont lik maths...so there we were..sitting there..totally bord..nd we cam up with this..**

**dont ask cozZ rly we just do not know...**

**ENJOY..!!**

**The Chronicles of Gerald – an RA fanfic**

There once was a garden gnome called Gerald who was digging up shitake mushrooms, for his Poo Stew, in Redmont forest.  
On this particular day Halt was teaching Will the most effective ways to look for food sources, so that he could make a stew (not Poo).

"Halt! Is that one ok?" Will asked his mentor.

Halt slowly began to smile then, "No."

Will looked disappointed but then he spotted another one. (at this point of the story you may be wondering what Will is 'spotting'...truth be told we are just the lamo authors and do not know any of the details...we just write the damn thing...)

"What about that one?"

"Will, you're just sad, really sad...and you stink."

"You smelled me? Was it when I bent over? It was, I know it was..."

"Will, Will, Will, you are a strange child."

Will grinned. "You taught me well."

Then Tug accidently walked so close to a tree that he touched it...only a little.

Suddenly it fell over!

It was at that moment that the two Rangers heard a scream.

"Scream!"

"What the hell?" Will exclaimed.

"Snapickles!!"

Slightly freaked out at the random voice Will asked, "Who's there?"

"Will, calm down." Halt said exasperatedly. "I'm sure its just someone who we didn't see that was standing next to the tree and it fell on them."

"Yes, yes. You are indeed right my good man!" a really high voice came from under the tree. "Now, could you please get this prucking tree off me!?"

Halt, in no hurry to help the rude…man?...under the tree, slowly dismounted and Will followed. Together they raised the tree off the ground slightly and out crawled a small (and we mean REALLY small) man.

"Hello."

"Hey," Will replied uncertainly.

He studied the…man before him. He was about not very high and was wearing a purple dress adorned with fluoro green ribbons. His shoes were like that of pixies, pointed and curly at the toes and had jingling bells all over them. His beard was long and grey with bright orange strands through it and his hair was even longer, also grey, and was in three chunky braids. On top of his head sat an upright Santa hat.

"OH-MY-GAWD!!" Halt suddenly exclaimed. "He is soooo _cute_!!"

Will looked at his mentor, a look of horror on his face. "You have got to be kidding me!?"

The man took a few wobbly steps forward. "I don't feel so good..."

"I don't blame you," Will assessed. "You've just been hit by a tree."

"Because of _you_." Halt accused.

"What!?" Will exclaimed. "I fail to see how this is my fault!"

"If you would stop feeding that horse of yours so many bloody apples he wouldn't be so fat which would mean he wouldn't be knocking down trees everywhere he goes!"

"What the f-!"

Will's naughty word was abruptly cut off by a thump.

_Thump._

The man they had just found was now unconscious on the ground.

* * *

**and that wazZ it...sooo we hope u liked it..**

**plzZ plzZ plzZ REVIEW!!**

**but no flames..**

**conley**

* * *


	2. Chapter 2

Gerald-Chapter 2

The two Rangers looked at the pathetic heterosexual looking gnome in front of them. A tear escaped from Halts eye as he knelt down next to the non –moving blob.

"Let's leave him here and go." Demanded Will.

"No!" Halt exclaimed. "We are keeping him!" Halt gently picked up the gnome and sat him on Abelard then he mounted the horse himself.

"We shall call him . . . Gerald!!"

Will looked at Halt like he was a bloody idiot, (AN: Connie's favourite phrase.) then slowly made his way to Tug, giving into his mentors idiocy . . . for now.


	3. Chapter 3

Gerald Chapter 3

"Yes."

"No."

"Yes."

"No."

"Yes."

"No."

"Yes."

"No."

"Yes."

"No."

"Yes."

"No."

"Yes."

"No."

"Yes."

"No."

"Yes."

"No."

"Yes."

"No."

"Yes."

"No."

"Yes."

"No."

"Yes."

"No."

"Yes."

"No."

"Yes."

"No."

"Yes."

"No."

"Yes."

"No."

"Yes."

"No."

"Yes."

"No."

"Yes."

"No."

"Yes."

"No."

"Yes."

"No."

"Yes."

"No."

"Yes."

"No."

"Yes."

"No."

"Yes."

"No."

"Yes."

"No."

"Yes."

"No."

"Yes."

"No."

"Yes."

"No."

"Yes."

"No."

"Yes."

"No."

"Yes."

"No."

"Yes."

"No."

"Yes."

"No."

"Yes."

"No."

"Yes."

"No."

"Yes."

"No."

"Yes."

"No."

"Yes."

"No."

"Yes."

"No."

"Yes."

"N"Yes."

"No."

"Yes."

"No."

"Yes."

"No."

"Yes."

"No."

"Yes."

"No."

"Yes."

"No."

"Yes."

"No."

"Yes."

"No."

"Yes."

"No."

"Yes."

"No."

"Yes."

"No."

"Yes."

"No."

"Yes."

"No."

"Yes."

"No. We are NOT keeping it."

"Yes we are and it's a he, not an it. You fool1 and you thought i was stupid."

Will looked at Halt, a vacant expression on his face. He then turned around and walked away. He made a cup of coffee which Halt took, as soon as he returned.

"Bitch!!" Will yelled. "I hate you."

"I know." Halt replied smugly. "No one likes a know-it-all!"

"No one likes you." A high pitched voice came from behind Will and he didn't need to turn to see who it was.

"We are deffo keeping him!" Halt said.


End file.
